Our relationship in the Covid stress test

For more than half a year our lives have been shaped by the threat posed by Covid-19 and its consequences. And there is no end and no solution is in sight. With numbers still rather low, situation in Latvia looks good. But nearly everywhere else in Europa and the world we’re heading towards a second wave.

The impact of the threat and the political decisions are becoming more and more apparent in our private lives and in our relationships. Many people experience multiple threats at the same time. It is the fear for one’s own health and for the health of children, parents and friends. It is fear of job loss and an unclear future. And it is the feeling that the right thing is not being done on a social and political level and that there is general perplexity. Forced to stay at home, many couples have to stay in a spatial narrowness. Life, love, education and work all in your own apartment. We have less contact with friends, there is less variety in leisure time and most events are cancelled. All of this can lead to stress, irritability and fear. And these tensions are also carried into the relationship.

How can you take reasonable countermeasures to become more relaxed stabilize our personal situation?

  • First of all: admit that these are difficult times. A crisis. Not a war, but a crisis. There are no simple answers. Breathe.
  • Now is not the time for big decisions and upheavals. Better small actions and small improvements, navigate on sight, review and adjust decisions at short notice.
  • Everything that contributes to relaxation is welcome: walks in the forest, cooking good food yourself and others, practising tolerance, meditating.
  • Create security, fight uncertainty. Make decisions with little risk, do not make large investments, stability comes before profit.
  • Practice gratitude: take stock every day and see what you can be thankful for. Concentrate on the basic needs, that you where able to meet: food, shelter, health, friends.
  • Broaden your individual space and your horizons: do something without your partner, retreat to the bathroom for 2 hours, maintain your hobbies, take an online course, learn a new language
  • Focus on positive things: the sun is shining, a friendly word from your neighbour, a bird singing, a smile.

If there are still constant tensions and arguments in everyday life, then it is time to get help. Why not use the crisis to acquire new skills for yourself and your partner? Communication and conflict resolution, planning and enjoying leisure time together. Heal old wounds, work up old injuries. So that the corona crisis does not become your relationship and life crisis. Some sessions of couple therapy can support you in the process.